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agreement to marry. As incomes
increased, so did the interest in diamond rings,
though to this day, a bride who cherishes the
customs of the past will not wear any gold jewelry
on her wedding day until after the ceremony.
Brides to be and their families gathered a "dote" or
dowry of household goods and clothing in hope or
marriage chests. This was often augmented with money
or property.
The wedding date was selected with care. A rainy
Sunday wedding was propitious, but certain times of
the year - Lent, Advent and May - were off limits
for religious reasons. Before the days of air
conditioning and refrigeration, August was thought
to be an unlucky month for marriage. Even today, it
is less practical than other months, since many
Italians vacation then, and it might be hard to
gather the families together. Of course, non
residents who chose a destination wedding in Italy
will not face this issue.
In southern Italy, wild bachelor parties are
uncommon as are raucous gatherings for the ladies.
Italian brides have often worn green, a traditional
color of fertility, the night before their weddings.
On her wedding day, the Italian bride wears a white
gown and veil. The white dress symbolizes purity
while the veil, sometimes torn for luck, prevents
the groom from clearly seeing the face of his
intended before the ceremony, and thereby bringing
bad luck upon the couple.
In villages of the Veneto region, the groom still
walks the bride and the rest of the wedding party to
the church. Traditional obstacles in their path
demonstrate the bride's virtues. These include a
broom, which the bride picks up to symbolize her
housekeeping abilities, a beggar to whom she gives
alms, and a crying child whom she comforts.
In other parts of northern Italy, the groom waits
for his bride at the door of the church with her
flowers in his hand. Since the bride is the last to
arrive, the groom's friends pass the time suggesting
she has changed her mind about the wedding. To even
the odds against this misfortune and others, the
groom traditionally carries a small piece of iron.
One of the most delightful Italian wedding customs
is the ribbon the bride and groom may find tied on
the church door. It represents their coming union.
After the ceremony, a pair of doves may be released
to represent the joy and bond of the new couple. As
the newlyweds make their way to their
flower-festooned car, they are showered with
"confetti." This refers to both paper confetti as
well as bags of five or seven candy-coated Jordan
almonds tied up in tulle to symbolize the union of
bitter and sweet in life. Throwing nuts and grain
was an ancient Roman custom.
Before arriving at the reception, the happy couple
sometimes stops at a local landmark, such as Rome's
Capitoline Museum complex, for a photography
session.
The best man supervises the pre-dinner toast, "per
cent'anni," to the bride and groom, to wish them 100
years together. As the festivities progress, other
popular toasts will be made. These include "evviva
gli sposi," a cheer for the new husband and wife.
Guests also demand the groom kiss his bride. They
themselves vie to kiss her for good luck.
A large part of any Italian gathering is the food.
The meal generally consists of variations on the
following: appetizers, breads, pastas, soups, meat
dishes, salads, fruits and dessert, in this case
wedding cake, and possibly other calorie-laden
delights. There will be an abundance of wine and
coffee, and often, fried dough covered with powdered
sugar for luck.
The happy couple shatters a glass whose broken
pieces indicate the number of years they will have
together.
Music and dancing includes traditional songs. The
lively and popular tarantella from southern Italy is
a reception favorite everywhere as are sentimental
dances between the bride and her father and the
groom and his mother. Guests who dance with the
bride are expected to give her money if she is
carrying a small satin bag to hold envelopes.
Otherwise, they will find a table supervised by
watchful relatives where gifts may be deposited. In
northern Italy, pieces of the groom's tie may be
sold to guests.
More Jordan almonds appear as favors for the guests.
These signify the prayers of everyone – happiness,
health, fertility, long life and prosperity.
When the bride and groom leave the reception, they
vainly hope their friends have not gone to great
lengths to embarrass or inconvenience them with
jokes and tricks. The newlyweds generally assume
their families will have opened all the gifts but
the ones they may give to each other before they
return from their honeymoon. And in Naples (Napoli),
the new bride may find herself obligated to bake and
deliver cakes to guests who attended her wedding.
A lively Italian wedding is a joyous affair.
Incorporating Italian wedding customs into your own
marriage can only increase the happiness of the
occasion. |
